  |
|
Sorry about the absence. I hope to be back by September 15 October 6, with a full explanation. Or, at least, a decent excuse.
"I do not understand this." The Essencia seemed confused. And angry. "I was told I would meet with one who possesses great greed and is immune to wisdom." It pointed to Banny. "Instead I have met one who one who possesses great wisdom and is immune to greed. Or was it possesses great greed, immune to wisdom. Let's see, I would meet with one who possesses wisdom and is immune to great greed. Sorry. It's so confusing!"
* * * * * *
"Leave the dog out of this," said the dog. "Let me try that again. Leave the dog- lea- leave the- (ahem) Leave the dog out of this. There we go. Sorry about that."
* * * * * *
"It's all right. You saved my life. I'm glad." She took a deep breath, let it out, took another. "If there is anything I can do to thank you, let me know." She stood up straight, squared her shoulders, took another slow deep breath, and nothing happened. "We can end this scene now," Lissa said. "Really."
* * * * * *
"When you speak of this, you will spell my name correctly. Aye en tee eye oh crap!"
* * * * * *
"Please listen to me, O'Herlihy. There is much we do not know about the gonners. Much we need to learn. Something that gonner said or did may have given you a valuable clue to something. You might not even realize you have this clue, but someday it may save your life."
Long pause.
Banny looked at the dog blankly. "I have a line?"
* * * * * *
The blind woman brushed her blonde hair away from her face, straightened her dark glasses. "The Forces Of Evil have been challenging The Forces Of Good since before time as we know it beg-."
"And now Good needs two new Champions," the dog continued. "Two Worthy Ones, to beat back Evil, and prevent the destruction of all good in the universe."
"The Good selected you two to fight the gonn-."
" 'Gonners' are what we call the the bad guys, the minions of Evil. They have super-human powers and abilities."
"You keep stepping on my line."
"You keep stepping on my tail."
* * * * * *
"Go away! We're full haha up!" the bouncer laughed. He pointed at Antonio. "He's making faces."
* * * * * *
"Who is wearing you?" Chuckie asked.
The blouse answered, subserviently, "What's her name. Oh, hell. I know this one!"
* * * * * *
Rosemary's arm s-t-r-e-t-c-h-e-d across, past Lissa, reaching Banny. Her hand expanded, so her fingers wrapped around his head several times and her palm covered his nose and mouth, smothering him. Rosemary's watch-strap broke, revealing a tattoo of a white triangle inside a black triangle, outlined and connected with red lines.
"Banny abstains," Rosemary said. "So that's one yes, one no, and I ha ha ha! Banny! He's licking my palm ha ha. Stop it Banny, I'm supposed be trying to haha kill you!"
* * * * * *
"Is this why you killed Cheryl? Because you offered her slime and she refused? Or did the poor girl just find out the truth about you, and had to be silenced?"
Chuckie paused for a moment. "Cheryl...? You mean Sheila? I mean Cheryl! Whichever! CUT!!!"
Go to Chapter 23: The Physics Of Magic
Go to Chapter 25: May Cause Nausea, Fatigue, Dry-Mouth, Hysteria, And Death
Bring your friends into the Gonspiracy! Tell them about
Banny
And
Lissa
and get their eternal gratitude, and a chance to win $10,000 and a Sony DVD Player, because using your friends for your own personal enrichment, and having them owe you for it, is the gonner way!
Home |
The Most Recent (Mis)Adventure |
Notes |
E-ditorials |
Letters |
Fan-Art |
The Message Board |
The Store |
Links
Copyright © 2003
Dave Lerner Stories (note that to use the mailto you'll need to edit it in your 'send to' window. I apologize, but I've already lost one address to spam, and if I get inundated again, I won't have time to read your letters.) - All Rights Reserved. Note that this includes images of the Tricryptogon, and the name "Tricryptogon".