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Sorry about the absence. I hope to be back by September 15 October 6, with a full explanation. Or, at least, a decent excuse.
Shampoo in the eyes; it wasn't the worst thing about being blind, of course, but still...
You'd think shampoo in the eyes would bother Nicoletta less than it would a sighted person. After all, she could easily find the washcloth to press against her eyes to lessen the stinging; it was right where she knew she left it. And she could keep her eyes open to wash them out, without blinking, easier. Certainly shampoo in the eyes handicapped her no more than she was a moment earlier.
But that wasn't the point. The point is that an eyeful of shampoo was a risk you had to take if you wanted to have eyes. Nicoletta still had her eyes, the damage was in the brain. Technically, her eyes themselves worked. They were like two remote cameras with the receiving tv monitors smashed. But pain she could feel. She had the disadvantage of shampoo in the eyes without the advantage of sight. Of course, having no eyes at all had its own disadvantages, or so she understood.
Nicoletta finished her shower. She was not in the habit of feeling sorry for herself. Not because she had been blind for about twenty years, there are people who have been blind longer who never adjust. She was just... fairly unemotional. An ex-boyfriend once compared her to Mr. Spock. Twenty years ago, after the car crash, when they told her her parents, her older brother, and her baby sister were all dead, and she'd probably be blind for life, she cried. For half an hour. Then intermttently for the next three days.
That was it.
She grabbed the towel, dried herself thoroughly. Then she wrung the towel out, hung it back up carefully. She stepped out, wiped her feet on the bath mat, and blow-dried her long strawberry-blonde hair. At least, it had been strawberry-blonde twenty years ago, and people told her it still was.
Many blind people are neat freaks. After all, if you can't see, you can't walk around the clothes and toys on the floor, and you have a much more difficult time finding something on a shelf. Besides, if you touch every surface in your house at one point or another, you'd want those surfaces clean.
Nicoletta was no exception. She sprayed Showair on the shower curtain, which she then closed to prevent mildew. Mr Fwuzzums would always tell her she didn't need to be quite so neat. She would then threaten to Nair him in his sleep, so he wouldn't shed so much.
Her eyes still stung. Maybe she should try to rinse them out. She could barely open them. What was in that shampoo? She'd better get her dog to read the ingredients.
She brushed her teeth, used mouthwash and various deodorants and perfumes. Mr. Fwuzzums told her that this was unnecessary. Human beings smelled fine the way they were. There is is nothing wrong with sweat. It is preferable to the perfume she currently wore. She told him that although she appreciated his expertise on many subjects, he always smells like either dirty dog or wet dog, and he went around sniffing piles of dog crap, and other dog's butts, and therefore was not an expert on scent. He stated that she had just proven him an expert on bad smells, and that when he said her perfume was the worst thing he ever smelled, he knew how bad that was.
Today Nicoletta used an extra splash of that particular perfume.
Admittedly, his senses of smell, hearing, and sight were all superior to hers. The first two were from his natural dogling abilities, and the third was because she's blind, remember?
Some people believe that if you lose one sense, the others automatically increase to compensate. Some people believe that if you send out one million unsolicited e-mails you'll be RICH RICH RICH!!! Both groups are about equally annoying.
The sense itself does not improve. If a man who wears glasses suddenly goes deaf, his vision will not immediately become 20/20. What might happen is that the deaf man will learn how to use his eyes to compensate. He might, like Sherlock Holmes, notice details that elude others, until he points them out. If he learns how.
Mr. Fwuzzums trained the young Nicoletta how to listen, as he trained her in so many things. She can not hear better than most people . But she does listen better.
No need for make-up just yet, she thought. Putting on make-up was one task he didn't teach her. Luckily, the Binghamton Center for Those Poor Little Blind Bastards helped teach her many things her dog couldn't. They're an excellent resource in many ways. They just need to do something about their name.
Nicoletta groped a bit, put on slippers, grabbed her cane, headed out of the bathroom. She was unconcerned about walking around the apartment naked. The only other one here was Mr. Fwuzzums, and he never wore clothes. Except for his collar and harness. And once a crown strapped to his head he needed her to remove. He never did explain the story behind that.
She headed to the kitchen to make breakfast for her and him. Her eyes still stung a little, but much less than before. They should be okay in a little while. The best thing about being blind was that if you got shampoo in the eyes at least you could keep them closed and still get around.
Go to Chapter 47: Employees Of Panderson Real Estate (Summaries And Evaluations)
Go to Chapter 49: Different Views
Bring your friends into the Gonspiracy! Tell them about
Banny
And
Lissa
and get their eternal gratitude, and a chance to win $10,000 and a Sony DVD Player, because using your friends for your own personal enrichment, and having them owe you for it, is the gonner way!
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Dave Lerner Stories (note that to use the mailto you'll need to edit it in your 'send to' window. I apologize, but I've already lost one address to spam, and if I get inundated again, I won't have time to read your letters.) - All Rights Reserved. Note that this includes images of the Tricryptogon, and the name "Tricryptogon".